deathsiren | Ic inbox

[ Dash would be saddened and mystified simultaneously by that outlook. He was raised thinking that it was okay to let people in close, even if it meant being hurt. His disconnect with the reality of others has happened mostly because he really didn't think he was getting hurt growing up. He tends to be very bad at acknowledging his own sad feelings.

Or negative ones. As seen now in the way he's basically stomping on his own uncertainty, trying to keep it from showing through. ]

Really? You think so? [ He considers that. ] What about me? Do you think I'll become that way if I start interacting with them more?

[ He's trying so hard to keep from seeming unsteady.

Talking about how Sungmin felt, earlier, is a welcome kind of distraction. ] That sounds wonderful... [ He pauses, then holds out his hand. ] Do you want to try again? And see how it feels?

[ Compared to Dash, Sungmin came across as much more of a realist and this from someone who still believed in true love and fairy tales. Who longed for some kind of happily ever after but such things were not really meant for his kind, sadly, and he had to work really hard to not accidentally allure someone.

Even his regular speaking voice tended to be compelling. It made him sadder than it should have for a siren. ]

No way, you're too pure hearted, Dash. You're too good to darken yourself like that.

[ He offered a smile, biting at his lip when Dash suggested trying again.

But after a second, he gave a slow nod of his head. ]

Maybe see if you feel anything.

[ There's a place for realism in fairy tales. Even happy endings have some logistical component. Otherwise there'd be no conflict to solve!

Dash is sort of coming to understand that as his life shifts and turns and takes all these unexpected detours he hadn't been anticipating. ]

You think so? [ He smiles a bit. ] I hope so. I don't want to lose sight of myself, you know?

[ He flexes his hand again, nodding in response. Then, cautiously, he extends his hand across the distance between them. When his fingertips brush across the top of Sungmin's hand this time, he tries to pay attention to what it feels like.

It certainly feels nice. ]

I think if you keep your mind focused on what you want to achieve it'll help. [ He paused for a moment, considering. ] Surreound yourself with those who know the actual you and they'll help you from losing yourself. Keeping you grounded.

Literally in your case. [ A really stupid remark to try and lighten the air a little bit and make Dash smile.

The touch this time around seemed stronger; maybe the extra focus on doing it and not by accident? It was even better than before and he let out a soft exhale, eyes fluttering closed. ]

What's it feel like to you? [ a slight pause and then - ] You must have a magic touch.

[ The punny comment works, and Dash laughs brightly. ] Thanks, Sungmin. You're good at cheering me up! [ It could be said that Dash is good at letting himself be cheered, but more than that, he's not entirely accustomed to someone taking the time.

Usually he beats them to the punch and talks himself out of feeling sad, because that's what being a super-optimist is about. Right? ]

Magic touch? [ he asks, nervous laughter in the words. ] I never would've guessed.

To me... it's like, hm. [ He runs his fingertips over Sungmin's knuckles, then nudges at his hand a little so he can do the same to his palm. ] It's hard to explain. It's warm. But it's also not at the same time.

That doesn't make much sense, does it?

[ When prompted, Sungmin flipped his hand over, sparks racing down the length of his arm from the touch. It might also help he had slightly sensitive hands to begin with and enjoyed his palm stroked. Probably a little odd but he enjoyed it more than his hair stroked and messed with.

Letting out an 'mmm' noise, he tried to focus again after a moment. Dash had words to say and he didn't want to miss them.

Blinking open his eyes, he tried to consider the words for a moment. ]

Have you ever felt it touching anyone else? Maybe it's different? I'm not sure. Has anyone ever told you that your touch feels good?

[ He paused for a moment. ] Oh. It'd probably be different context huh?

[ Dash notices the reaction and smiles a little, biting his lip to hold it back a bit. He does it again, more slowly. If Sungmin's enjoying himself, far be it from him to stop!

He gives most of his attention to doing so, at least until Sungmin speaks. At which point, he pauses to think. His other hand rises to cradle the back of Sungmin's, so it can merely rest against his palm. ]

Well... it's been awhile, actually. Since I really touched someone. [ He smiles sheepishly. ] That's not to say I haven't!

But maybe... well, I was hidden before, right? No one could sense me until the magic that was hiding me was gone.

Maybe something else changed then. [ He chews on his lip. ] I guess it's possible...

[ At the insistence, Sungmin couldn't help the breathless laugh. The warmth and drifting sensation were really, really good and he liked it. More than he wanted to admit to because it seemed too uncertain at the moment. Dash didn't have any ideas about what he could or couldn't do.

Would being a siren have some kind of impact? There were far too many questions to ponder with the situation. ]

Good information to have. [ He teased, leaning into Dash's body just a little. ]

Hmm it could have woken up whatever it is you can do. There's probably more to it than just making someone feel nice.

[ A light blush stained his cheeks. ] Let me know if your mind gets fuzzy at all. That's usually the first sign of being lured. Usually, I'm really good at not doing it but you never know.

[ Dash actually turns red and laughs again, nudging Sungmin's arm with his elbow while still hanging onto his hand. ] What are you going to do with that information? [ he asks, sounding amused.

On a slightly more serious note: ] I wouldn't be sad if that was my ability.

Making people feel nice, I mean. [ He draws an idle shape on Sungmin's palm while he speaks. ] That would be a great ability. "The god of good feelings." I'd be happy with that!

[ But. ] You're probably right though. There's probably something else to it.

Maybe I should... stop. [ He frowns a little, somewhat petulant. ] It might have some kind of negative effect on you.

I feel fine though, I promise! Totally clear-headed. [ Except for the part of him that is very naturally charmed by Sungmin, that is. ]

[ With his free hand he patted Dash's cheek lightly over the blush, smiling almost smugly. ] I'm not sure yet but if it makes you feel better I haven't touched anyone in awhile either or been touched!

[ Another soft sigh, even more content sounding than the last. ] Feel Good can be your title.

[ Negative effect? He frowned right along with Dash. ] If it helps, I don't think anything negative can be done to me with my ties to the underworld.

[ He gave a little shrug of his shoulder as if it didn't matter much. ]

Okay, good, but you - don't have to stop if you don't want to.

[ Dash's face scrunches up a bit with the force of his grin there. Whether or not he's been touched a lot lately, he certainly seems to like it. ]

That's okay, right? Well, I mean... unless you want things to be different. [ And want to have someone around with whom you can be affectionate. Dash sighs in a manner that seems to perhaps indicate this is a thing he wants. ]

Feel Good! I like it. [ He cups Sungmin's hand in his, holding onto it carefully. Tenderly. ]

Oh, do you think so? I hope that's right, because I wouldn't want you to get hurt. Especially not over something that feels nice... [ Now he's sort of distractedly playing with Sungmin's hand, gentle little touches scattered here and there. ]

I'll be honest. I do like it...

[ For a siren, not having affection at all made him wilt a little but no one ever wanted just him once they found out his status. They only wanted the image; the fantasy to curl around them. It exhausted him completely so he had refrained for some time, which might explain why Dash impacted him more. ]

Are you asking if I want to be affectionate with you, Dash?

[ Very light teasing but he could not help himself at all. ]

I like it too. It feels good. [ Raising his free hand, he brushed his fingertips along Dash's cheek. ] Does it feel different if I touch you?

[ It might be that the absence of these things has made Dash feel the desire for them more strongly too. Possibly. He's trying very hard to bear that in mind while he stands here opposite Sungmin.

Very hard indeed. ] Oh, well... I mean! It doesn't have to be me. But if it's something you want... [ He shrugs around a shy smile. ] I don't think you should have to be without affection.

I like you! [ The words aren't hard for him to say, but that doesn't mean that they're weightless. ]

Um, [ he begins, eloquently, when Sungmin touches him. Carefully, he leans into the touch a bit. ] Well, I think this would feel really nice no matter what, if you want my honest opinion.

[ Fondness rose up so quickly within him it nearly took his breath away. Dash seemed to have a special talent for it already. It kind of surprised him in a way but made him happy all the same. ]

I like you. You shouldn't be without affection either. You seem very affectionate. [ Not something hard to pick up on with Dash at all.

Fingers drifting all along Dash's cheek, he laughed a little. ]

You're right. This might just feel good because of the obvious and not an ability thing.

[ He fell silent for a moment. ] Does this affection thing include cuddling?

[ Dash feels a little silly about his outburst of a reply, but he doesn't seem to be letting it get him down. He breathes in and lets out a happy little sound. ] You got me! I definitely like to be affectionate with people.

But it's not something to do without knowing the other person wants it, of course. [ He clears his throat and squares his shoulders. Right. Proper behavior.

Sort of. He tucks his head closer to Sungmin's hand again. ] Ability or no, it's nice. [ Didn't he come here to focus on cupcakes?

He's completely forgotten. ]

Maybe it does. That would make sense, wouldn't it?

[ Before everything happened, Sungmin held a lot of affection and easily shared it with others, sometimes too much in the case of wayward traveler's in the sea depths but after the cleansing things were different. Sure, he fell into bed with plenty of people but never for long and he always left feeling worse.

The warmth and safety never existed, nor the spark and excitement of something new. Just a whole lot of hollowness instead.

But the affectionate ways still existed inside of him. ]

You don't have to worry about me. I do want it.

[ His hand remained cupping Dash's cheek, a feather light touch. ]

Let me phrase this another way. Do you want to cuddle with me? [ Being coy never seemed to work out right for him. ]

[ It's hard to kill that desire to be affectionate. Dash has spent a lot of time trying-without-trying to do it. He works a lot. Sometimes he doesn't know why he's working so much, but it might be easier than feeling lonely.

He certainly doesn't feel lonely right now.

This is quite a revelation to him, actually. Especially now that they're having such a direct conversation about it. ]

I don't think I'd be unhappy about that at all, [ he says, grinning in a sort of private way while he averts his eyes. ] It sounds nice.

[ More than nice. But maybe he's getting ahead of himself a little. Maybe... ] Maybe sometime when we're not in your kitchen? [ He's not saying this to put Sungmin off. In fact, his intention is to be encouraging. They've only met once.

He'd really like to see Sungmin again. ]

[ The hint of the promise in the words had him smiling again and he gave a slow nod of his head with the recognition. It meant Dash wanted to see him again and spend more time together, which he also wanted. Being around Dash connected him more to the world around him, something he hadn't experienced much at all until that point. Usually, things were far more drifting and almost aimless in a way. ]

Cuddling in a kitchen setting would not be easy. Unless you used the counters or something but not very practical.

[ At least, the bakery kitchen had larger counters than the ones he had at home. He loved his kitchen, though, and spent the most time there than any other part of the home. ]

At least I know with you there, it'll still be just as sweet as this one.

[ Cheesy? He just couldn't help it! ] Are you hungry at all for something other than sweets? I can make you anything you'd like.

[ It would please Dash a lot to know he made someone feel sort of grounded. He often feels like he's just the opposite. Like maybe he's just going to float away somewhere strange one day.

That feeling doesn't necessarily have a practical root, except for the fact that people tend to think of him as fanciful. Either way, it'd be nice to be... the opposite of that. Or something like it.

He covers his mouth with his hand, muffling a chuckle behind it. ] You might get a soup ladle poking you in the spine or something. [ He mouths a little 'ow.' ]

You are charming, oh flirty one. [ He says this in a teasing tone, but his cheeks are pink nonetheless. ] If this kitchen's sweet enough now, maybe you're right, and we should work on something savory?

[ Make no mistake, he's not just going to let go of that flirty remark. ] As for sweetness, the kitchen doesn't need me or baked goods to be perfectly so. [ Two can play that game! ]

[ The blush had him smirking, fingertips reaching out to poke Dash's cheeks over it. 'So cute' he mouthed, letting his hands fall back to his sides a few moments later. Being touchy feely came naturally for him even after going so long without being close to anyone. It made him realise how lonely he had been and for such a long time. ]

Savory I can do just as well. [ Was that a wink? Indeed and a very, very playful one too but again he could not help himself in the least bit.

The flirting remark on Dash's end had his eyes widening a little. It even took him a second to respond. ]

Oh, you know how to play too huh? How lucky am I?

[ His own faint blush staining his cheeks, he gestured over go the ovens. ]

Did you want a bowl of soup? Or a sandwich?

[ Laughing quietly, Dash waves off the little touch in a playful way. He's not at all bothered by it. More endeared, really. It's nice to feel there's so little space between them. Whatever that happens to mean, whether it's literal or not.

It's metaphorical as well, and evident in the way Dash laughs along with Sungmin's remarks, doing so with such ease. He very boldly sidles over in a sort of faux seductive way. Ooh, Mr. Sungmin, ooh. ] Oh, tell me more about this savory food! [ Now that he's closer, he settles in by Sungmin, nearly elbow to elbow with him.

Ready, it seems, to watch him work. There's a little sidelong smile at the comment about play. ] If you're lucky, I think I must be too.

[ He hums thoughtfully. ] I would love to try some soup you made, if that's all right? [ All the teasing melts off his face and his smile turns sweet and gentle again. There's something very earnest about it. Because his interest is sincere. ]

[ Happiness flooded through him from the easy laughter and playfulness. Unable to really have enough of both and the endearment level kept rising higher and higher the more time they spent with one another. Dash being one of a kind in the best way possible.

Giving a little noise but not quite a hum, Sungmin started thinking about different soup types. He took food very seriously all the time, after all, and greatly enjoyed indulging. Thankfully, his siren side metabolized food really quickly, keeping him from having to limit himself.

He never enjoyed limits of any kind. ]

The savory you'll just have to wait for. [ He twisted his body some to pat Dash's cheek lightly. ]

Any certain kind of soup? I have vegetable and chicken noodle already made from earlier. They're popular choices when it's cold. [ He explained, pulling out both tubs from the fridge to place on one of the countertops. ] But I can make anything else you'd like. There are certain breads to go with each and wines. They bring out the certain flavors.

[ Another faint blush. ] I might think too much about these things.

[ No limits? Those are some of Dash's favorite words.

Sadly, he doesn't have a super-speedy metabolism to justify eating a ton of food. No, he's lucky his nickname is 'Dash' - he gets enough exercise to do something about the rather large quantities of tasty food he eats.

Some of that exercise seems to come in the form of giggling a lot, because he's doing that again after Sungmin's 'savory' comment. He's half-breathless with it by the time he's even thinking of trying to come up with a reply to the question about soup. ]

Oh, it's been a long time since I had chicken noodle soup! [ His mouth forms a little o-shape. ] I'd really like that. Is it okay? [ Dash looks wide-eyed and excited. ]

Don't worry about it either! It's what you're passionate about, isn't it? Of course you'd think about it often! [ He offers a bright smile. ] It's nice to watch you be excited about it. [ Actually, very nice. It really makes Dash's heart feel warm and it's been some time since he felt this way. Or anything akin to it. Something... sort of separate from simple affection or happiness. Kinship, maybe? ]

[ Dash's laughter sort of paused everything on Sungmin's end as he just took in the moment. The darkness of it, at least, in his last ten years because he tended to stray from bonding enough with others for such a moment to happen. But here Dash wandered into his life and lit everything up. Sparked things back to life he believed he lost out at sea. ]

You're so cute. [ He managed to voice, already grabbing for a bowl to heat up some of the soup, grabbing for bread and a glass of wine. ]

You can eat at the nook. It's a special corner of the bakery. My favorite because it's tucked in and cozy. The overstuffed couch really makes it better too.

[ Once he finished, he motioned for Dash to follow him and place everything onto the table in front of the couch. There were booths, of course, and other tables if Dash preferred them. ]

I am passionate about it. It's the one thing that's made sense for me.

[ Dash feels different here too. Not in the same ways, because he's not dealing with the same sorts of dilemmas about interpersonal relationships, but...

It's similar, in a sense. He can't totally put his finger on the difference between this interaction and others he's had, except to say he feels comfortable now. That's the big difference. He feels comfortable being this comfortable with someone. Maybe that sounds weird, but for someone as naturally gregarious as Dash, it's pretty habitual to invite people to get close.

It just happens.

Sometimes it means he's awfully, awfully transparent. And people can take advantage of it. Feeling at ease with someone means he doesn't have a fear of this happening. And he doesn't have that with Sungmin. He can follow the other without feeling uneasy. ]

You love this space, too, don't you? [ he asks, when they make their way to the couch, which he occupies as easily as anywhere else in the bakery so far. It's just... easy. It's not something he has to second-guess. ] Made sense, huh?

[ He echoes the words thoughtfully. ] I like the way you talk about this. [ A smile, bright and open. ] You're cute, too, Sungmin.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject